What is your purpose?
Like my clients, it may be…
- making a difference in the lives or careers of your employees, students, patients, or clients
- supporting the environment, diversity & inclusion, health, art, architecture, children’s education, girls and women’s empowerment, real estate, or anything else.
But have you considered that…
- being an amazing spouse, a good parent, or grandparent that leaves a legacy in your children and grandchildren’s life,
- or bringing happiness and joy to your circle of friends and family
could also be part of your purpose?
What if BOTH categories were an integral part of your purpose or “sacred work” as my colleague Beverley Barnes calls it?
Your purpose–what brings meaning to your life–, can take many forms. And some of its forms are all too often ignored.
For many of my clients, whatever their gender identity is, being a good parent or a good partner, is as important to them as making a difference in the world with their work.
It’s why, when I help them clarify their purpose in my Land the Career You Love coaching program, we look at the holistic picture to ensure we integrate it all.
Career and purpose coaching need to be holistic to make a true difference in people’s lives and ensure fulfillment at ALL levels, not just at the professional level disconnected from the rest.
It is also the reason why in the past eight months, I have been quieter and not sharing as much. I’ve been putting attention to another important part of my purpose and sacred work while continuing to serve my 1:1 clients.
As you probably know, a BIG part of my purpose is to help high-achieving leaders discover the work that reignites their passion and makes a difference.
Well, I recently realized that there is another part of my purpose that is as important. This is being an amazing partner and deepening the relationships with my loved ones.
I had always known it was important to me, but I had never considered it part of my purpose. So, I would spend a lot of time on this part of my life, but I would dismiss it as outside the scope of my purpose or my “work.” I would feel some kind of guilt that I would spend so much time on it at the expense of what is supposed to be “real work and purpose in the world.”
In the past few months, I realized that being an amazing partner is an integral part of my purpose and calling. It is not outside of it. It is IT. When I spend time and energy on it, I’m actually living my purpose and doing my sacred work in the world.
- Do you know what are the components of your purpose and your “sacred work’?
- Do you dismiss anything that does not look like what society tells you should be “work” or “purpose”?
- Do you hold a holistic view of your purpose?
I’d love to hear your insights. Comment below and let me know.
How kind are you being to yourself?
As I mentioned in my previous post, I spent eight weeks traveling in France and Mexico this summer, for a combo of vacation and remote work. It was one of my 2021 intentions coming true and I loved it.
What I have not told you is that It took me two full weeks to readjust to my life in California after all this time away. During those two weeks, I had not much desire to do any work stuff except my clients’ calls.
I noticed last Saturday how hard I was on myself because there was business stuff that I had not done yet or important emails I had not followed upon.
Then, I realized how during those past two weeks, I was just not in an emotional and mental space to focus on my business as much. It is not that I was “lazy” or “unproductive” (as my inner critic wanted me to believe), it is simply that my system—emotional, mental, and physical—needed time to reset and reintegrate into my life here, after such a deep connected experience in my native land. I needed integration time. I’ve noticed over the years that the longer and deeper the experience is, whether travel, retreat, or training, the longer the integration back will need to be. And it is important to honor that. There is no bypassing it. This is a natural process, as natural as the change of seasons or the blossoming of a flower.
Being kind to yourself is giving compassion for that part who needs integration time, instead of judging it. Would you judge a flower for the time it takes to blossom? or the seasons for the process it takes to go from one to the next?
Well, now I feel at peace with exactly where I am at, what I’ve done and what I’ve not done yet. I feel relaxed about it and know that all will be done in its natural timing. My energy and motivation to invest in my life and business in California are back. They just went back naturally when I was ready, without forcing it or trying to make it happen. As things happen in nature. Organically and effortlessly.
- Are you letting things unfold in their own natural timing or are you forcing things to happen before the timing is right?
- Are you going with the flow of the river of life while taking the necessary actions you are called to take–this does not mean being passive–, or are you trying to push against the flow of the river in your life?
The second option is exhausting, will make everything hard, and will often not get you where you want to go. Rather the opposite.
Wishing you kindness and compassion towards yourself.
Photo: In Her Image Photography
To be fully alive and whole, we need to embrace not only our positive emotions (e.g., joy, happiness, pleasure, pride) but also the “negative” ones (e.g., sadness, fear, anger, frustration). Each time we deny our natural “negative” emotions, we deny access to a part of ourselves and we become less alive. Instead of showing the “real” us, we show only a part of ourselves to the world. Positivity is beneficial as long as it is not a way to cover up and repress our natural and human emotions. Being human and alive is embracing the full spectrum of our emotions when they appear, in the moment. Let’s celebrate and nurture our humanness and beautiful vulnerability!